Days after 40 days

Is it any surprise that the two of them did not get together in the end?

I don’t know.

I was at a Christmas dinner for the practice group (in a law firm) that I was interning at just last week. The conversation that was going across the table ran from adultery, cheating, divorce, marriage, love and the like. One thing that came up was how it was impossible for a man and a woman to maintain a purely platonic relationship. Or at least the theory (according to them, adult men and women in their late 20s) is that men only have one thing in their mind, and that it is in their nature to cheat.

But I digress.

I kinda want to talk about my thoughts on whether it is possible for friends, best friends to become lovers, but I think I want to leave that discussion for another time. Instead, I want to talk about the one thing that stuck with me throughout the experiment.

I remember there was this diary entry for one of the 40 days, Jessica talked about how her parents’ relationship had affected her views on love, as well as her own expectations and aspirations.

I think I can identify with that.

I wonder if the reason why I am so utterly disinterested (turned off) in dating and relationships is because my parents have gotten to a point in their relationship where they are no longer affectionate (and for as long as I can remember). No hugs, no kisses, lots of bickering, lots of quarrelling. Sure, I know they care for each other, but are they still in love?

That also raises the issue of how I think love and marriage are two different things. Marriage is a commitment. What happens why you stop loving your other half? I digress again.

Perhaps growing up in such an environment is the reason why I don’t look forward to being in a relationship myself; I am afraid of how my relationship with another person would turn out the same way. This would also explain why I am so non confrontational because I can’t stand drama in my life.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s